Scared to go to the gym

[Greenja]

I started doing stronglifts at home last summer and really enjoyed working out and eating healthy, i only bought some beginner weights though and made my own squat stands so i ran out of weights pretty quickly. This happened last september about the same time i was heading back to university though so it wasn't a big problem, i'd just carry on at my university gym when i got back.

I really wish that had happened, but i just can't get myself in the gym. All last term i was wanting to go but was too nervous, it feels pretty pathetic really. Then i was back home over christmas break and started back up again for the 3 weeks i was home and again was really enjoying it, now i've been back at university for 3 weeks and i was so determined to get into the gym, but i've still not managed it.

Loads of times i've packed my bag ready to go after a day at uni (the gym is next to my university building) and bitched out. Just got home today after going up to the entrance to the gym (after walking past it a couple times lol) seeing all these people that look so much better than i do and turning straight back around.
I've always had trouble with this kind of thing, feeling self-concious and awkward, worrying about not looking as good as everyone else. Also, i've always hated doing something for the first time and not knowing exactly what to do, like i worry about doing the wrong thing in the gym, not knowing where things are, etc and looking like a fool.
I'm fine if i'm with somebody else though, all my friends think im quite a confident person but i'm not, they just only see how i am when im with people i know.
I've been trying to get somebody to go with to the gym this whole time but none of my friends are interested.

Does anybody have any advice or suggestions that might help me overcome this? It's starting to really annoy me now, especially when i think about how much i could of achieved since september if i'd been on the program this whole time.
This is something i enjoy doing and really want to do but i'm just being a total pussy about it and can't seem to get over it.

Sorry for the long post here guys lol thanks for any help.

[rere]

Honestly for me, I always take my training log with me. This is what actually motivates me to hit the gym. That's all I care about when I leave my house/work to go and train.

Just got home today after going up to the entrance to the gym (after walking past it a couple times lol) seeing all these people that look so much better than i do and turning straight back around.

You need to develop the habit of going to the gym and working out. It amazes me how I still go to the gym regularly and it's all down to my training log. It's a good motivator and I suggest you start taking yours to the gym. After a while you won't have feelings of being scared, you now will have a purpose of actually beating your previous records by actually bringing your log with you.

It amazes me still, how people train without a log.

Hope I helped you

rere

[Greenja]

I do take my log with me in my bag every time, its not been updated in a long time though!
I know what you mean about the purpose of beating previous records, when i was working out at home over the summer i loved setting PR's every session, it felt awesome. Especially when the session before felt like i couldnt of done any heavier.

Your right i do need to develop the habit of going to the gym, that's exactly what i'm trying to do but i just can't get the confidence to even step foot in there, it just feels too intimidating.
When i could do my workouts at home i had no problem with building the habit, i did 7 weeks over the summer and never missed a workout.

Thanks for your input rere.

[Mrmcd666]

I felt the same way the very first time I went to the gym. The whole day I was nervous but once I got there I realized it was really not a big deal. YOu got to realize most people who go to the gym are too focused on there own workouts to judge you. Also keep in mind if you follow the 5x5 workout and make the squat your priority they will have nothing to judge you on as everybody knows you got to have a lot of dedication to do squats, as most people are pussy's who never do squats. Who knows you may even turn a few heads. Just go and I guarantee you will feel better about yourself. Take it from me I have always had a hard time finding dedicated training partners and have relied on going by myself but I aint going to allow that to hold me back.

[errat1c]

Like many others on this forum, i was the same. I used to go to the gym with a friend but had to go solo somenights. The thing is....no one else realy takes notice of the others at the gym, they all know people start somewhere. Best thing for you to do is to just get your ass in there and do it!

[Mouse]

Just got home today after going up to the entrance to the gym (after walking past it a couple times lol) seeing all these people that look so much better than i do and turning straight back around.

They've all been in the same boat too, everyone starts somewhere.

Yes they may look at you, it's only natural as you are a new face to the gym.

But go twice, three, four times and they will know you are serious and respect you for that.

[Greenja]

Thanks for all the rapid replys guys, really appreciated.

I know it basically boils down to just man up and do it but ive been telling myself that for all these months and it's not helping.

I just can't help over analysing everything and coming up with all these stupid illogical worries. I worry that my gym clothes don't look right (everyone has jogging pants or normal lookin shorts, mine are camo baggy shorts) i worry about what should i do if the squat rack is in use, i'd feel like a prick just standing there waiting, and if i left the free weights room to go do a bit more cardio warm up while i wait i'd feel like i looked as if i'd just wandered in there, realised i didnt belong there and walked out and the people in there would think this. I worry about not knowing where the plates are, not knowing where to deadlift, I even worry about not knowing where the changing rooms are!
It drives me crazy.

Today when i turned around from the entrance it wasn't about looking like an idiot doing the lifts, i saw all these attractive people in nice gym clothes and just felt like i'd look like an idiot in my camo shorts and old t-shirt, like i just didn't look like i belong there and then all those worries of not knowing where things are etc just seemed worse.

Ok i feel like im just whining now, it helps knowing you guys have felt nervous going too and gotten over it, i guess everyone does the first time.
Hopefully the "man up" approach will win over soon, cause its pissing me off wasting all this time.

Thanks again for the help everyone.

[baughmjk]

Greenja,

When I first started doing stronglifts at the gym without a partner, I felt like a fool squatting with no weight on the bar. I went by myself with no experience whatsoever doing squats, deadlifts, press, etc. There were guys next to me squatting over 300 (with poor form, but still intimidating to me).

But I went anyways.

You've been telling yourself to man up. Now I'm telling you to man up. You will feel out of place, other people will be lifting more than you. None of that matters. None of it has any relevance to your goals. You won't achieve anything unless you get your ass into the gym.

[FilthyMcNasty]

Greenja - is it possible your experiencing some kind of anxiety disorder? Are you an inverted or outgoing person normally ?

[Portillo]

Im scared of going to the gym too. Scared of heavy squatting!

[ZachPSU]

Give yourself a good 2 weeks of going regularly, and you'll notice it is always the same faces there, and you won't feel like an outsider.

[Owehn]

Hey Greenja,

I'm scared of going to the gym too. Whenever I'm there, I always feel like the weakest, smallest person in the room. I'm scared of having to ask someone to indulge my request to work in with them. I'm scared of missing reps and having to crawl out from underneath the bar, even though I know how to do it safely, just because I know I'll be embarrassed. I'm scared of going to get a drink of water and coming back to find someone else using the equipment I've set up, then facing the prospect of confronting them or moving on to something else.

All these things have happened, and I'm still afraid of them. But I go to the gym anyway. Why? Well, habit. And when I say habit, I mean "practice". Dwelling on the reasons why you're not going to the gym is like practicing not going. Practice going instead. Eventually, the "going" part of going to the gym will be autopilot, and you can learn to just focus on lifting the weights.

Here are some things you can keep in mind:

1. Go in with a plan. It's your first time, so it doesn't have to be complicated, but go in with a purpose. If that purpose is "go in, have a look around to find everything, then leave", you have my permission to walk in and back out again. (In fact, I'm pretty sure that's what I did my first time.) When you accomplish that, next time that part will be a little easier, and you will have picked something else to do.

2. Go in with a partner. You mentioned you're a lot more confident when you're with someone else. Perhaps you have a friend who'd be willing to go in with you a few times. There are pros and cons to having a training partner, so it doesn't have to be a big commitment. Just get someone to walk in with you and make the circuit of trying out the things you want to be using. While you're there, you'll realize:

3. What other people think doesn't matter. Know why? Because they're not even thinking about you. When you walk in and out again on your first time (or whatever your plan is, right?), there are so many plausible reasons for why you're doing that (maybe he forgot his ipod or waterbottle? maybe he was looking for someone and they weren't here?) that no one will notice or care. If you have to approach someone for some reason, then you'll occupy a tiny fraction of their mind for a few moments, then they'll get back to thinking about whatever they're doing next. You're just not that big a deal to them, even if you are wearing different shorts.

So the moral is: Practice going to the gym, not finding reasons to stay home. Go with a plan you know you can accomplish. If you have trouble attempting it even though you know you are capable, get someone who'll hold you accountable. And don't worry about other people, but let them worry about themselves.

Good luck, and let me know how your first day goes!

[bigandstrong]

Greenja - I've been really mulling over this for the past few hours.


First up - don't feel bad about being "scared to go to the gym". That you got to the door separates you from so many other people it's not funny. You are already streets ahead of those that made a drunken new years resolution to shape up. Give yourself some credit there.

Secondly - does your uni gym have personal trainers? If so maybe you can book in with one and get them to run through 5x5 with you?

Thirdly - get there with a mate

Fourth thought - get some motivational tunes

Fifth thought - Who gives a flying what you are wearing? It's not a fashion comp. Get in there and bring fear to the weights.

[MikeD]

Sometimes I'll kinda fix myself up before going to the gym (same as when you're going anywhere public), but most times I don't care if I look like complete crap. Basically roll out of bed and put something on I can squat in . If people care about what you're wearing than they're obviously less serious then you are about working out.

If someone's using the rack, ask if you can work in. Offer to change the plates, because you're the one who asked after all.

Get over the anxiety by just going, you're in control of things.

[Greenja]

Well, i did it!

I just got up this morning, saw so many replies from all you guys and that just really gave me the push i needed. I felt like if you guys could take the time to sit and write out those posts to help me the least i could do is stop being a pussy and get my ass in the gym.

I nearly wussed out as i was approaching the gym again, i went past and it looked really busy and i just kept walking right on by lol. I circled round the block and just kind of thought that all you guys had my back and that just gave me the confidence to just walk in there, and after that it wasn't even that bad!

I had to ask some stupid questions at some points and felt quite awkward when i first went in the free weights room, there was alot of big people in there and it took me a while to figure out where things were and i was wandering around looking a bit lost for about the first 10minutes lol.
My squat form was totally terrible cause i was still pretty nervous at that point and there was a huge mirror in front of me and i could see alot of people behind me and some were looking at me, but i just got on with it. I thought i'd start really low with the weights anyway so cut it in half from what i was doing back at home a month ago so the bad form wasn't too much of a problem, i'm sure i'll feel alot better next time and correct my technique.

I even worked in with 2 guys on the bench press who were putting up alot more weight than me, but they didnt seem bothered they were pretty friendly and i didn't feel embaressed by it or anything.

It felt so good when i had finished my workout and walked out the gym, i was smiling the whole way home. It was no where near as bad as i had built it up to be in my head, the only bit that was hard was just getting in there in the first place.

I couldn't of done it without you guys, i've been trying for a long time! So really thanks to all of you for your support this is such a great website and community.
These words especially were the ones that motivated me to do what i needed to do:

If people care about what you're wearing than they're obviously less serious then you are about working out.
Get over the anxiety by just going, you're in control of things.

Greenja - I've been really mulling over this for the past few hours.

First up - don't feel bad about being "scared to go to the gym". That you got to the door separates you from so many other people it's not funny. You are already streets ahead of those that made a drunken new years resolution to shape up. Give yourself some credit there.

Fifth thought - Who gives a flying what you are wearing? It's not a fashion comp. Get in there and bring fear to the weights.

Greenja,
You've been telling yourself to man up. Now I'm telling you to man up. You will feel out of place, other people will be lifting more than you. None of that matters. None of it has any relevance to your goals. You won't achieve anything unless you get your ass into the gym.

I felt the same way the very first time I went to the gym. The whole day I was nervous but once I got there I realized it was really not a big deal. YOu got to realize most people who go to the gym are too focused on there own workouts to judge you. Also keep in mind if you follow the 5x5 workout and make the squat your priority they will have nothing to judge you on as everybody knows you got to have a lot of dedication to do squats, as most people are pussy's who never do squats. Who knows you may even turn a few heads. Just go and I guarantee you will feel better about yourself. Take it from me I have always had a hard time finding dedicated training partners and have relied on going by myself but I aint going to allow that to hold me back.

Hey Greenja,

Everything that Owehn said

Those are just the parts that really struck at me but everything everyone said here was a huge help, thanks again to you all.

I can't wait till monday to get back in there!