The 10 Biggest Mistakes Men Make with Women

[Playboy]

This really isn't going anywhere, I feel like I'm getting what I type explained back to me in other words as if it was a novel idea. Maybe I'm not articulating myself correctly.

[jr84]

Trying to make things happen puts stress on you and it puts you in this desperate/needy mode. Women can smell it that you have an agenda. The right way is to assume something will happen and stop caring whether it does or not, stop caring whether there is a result.

This.

Guys spend countless wasted hours chasing women that could be better spent doing just about anything. Self improvement, hanging out with friends, learning a new skill, getting fitter, reading, sleeping...

I'd rather spend time working on self improvement than speaking to women I'm ONLY speaking to because I think either a) they're attractive and/or b) they'll sleep with me. I'm still guilty of it, but 50% less time chasing girls is 25% more time spent doing something useful (and lets be honest, 25% more time procrastinating ).



However, I proudly present the best chat up line ever. "Can I buy you a drink or should I just give you the money?"

[Mehdi]

k, as some of you are aware, I've recently left RSD.

Before I go on to explain the reasons behind this, I think it's important to say that there has not been a 'falling out'. Sorry. No drama. Well, not of that kind, anyway.

Also, anyone looking at the RSD forum will notice that my archive has been deleted. This is because I personally requested it's deletion, and I would like to thank Tyler and the guys for doing that for me. They didn't have to and make the waves associated with it, but they did and I thank them for that.

To quote from the email I sent to Tyler asking for him to do this:

" A lot of the stuff I've advised guys to do and a lot of the ways I've
told guys to think are going to lead them into very dark places. It's
something I wasn't prepared to admit while I was still in RSD, but
it's abundantly clear to me now that I've been misusing my gifts as a
writer and a thinker to glorify myself at the expense of what's really
good for the people who trust me and listen to me. "

And that's the truth, guys.

Ok, the reason I left RSD is this. I am done with seduction. I really am. I don't think that there's a future there for me, and I don't think it's what I should be doing. Recently I've been feeling like the darkness inherent in that path is too much for me to take, to handle, or to survive.

There is nothing more seductive than the seduction community. It really, really got under my skin. It really, really went to my head. And the blunt truth is that the deeper I got into it, the more I realised that the vision of the 'happy seducer' that we all cherish and strive for is, I believe, a fiction.

Now, RSD is very open about this. Tyler has said on several occasions that it is in sorting out your life that you sort out your love life, and Jeffy has spoken live in many instances on the fact that seduction will not and cannot 'save' you.

Before I go on, I would like to state that I believe that RSD represents the very best of the community, not simply in their ability to build your confidence and success with women but also in terms of their integrity as men.

However, I do not believe that the mission to 'get good with women' is one which is emotionally sustainable nor ultimately healthy. It is good inasmuch as it provides a focal point for self-improvement, but I feel that there is a fundamental contradiction between detaching yourself from ego, self-worship and pride by embarking on a campaign of short-term superficial physical relationships with strangers.

This is a personal opinion which I have reached myself after extensive testing. I do not want it to be true. I wish that I could believe that there is redemption in charisma, in sex and in the glory of owning a club but the truth is that I have climbed to the top of that mountain and found nothing there but a cliff-face.

This is not a condemnation of any of the guys at RSD, who I still consider my friends. They are a superb group of men, deeply committed to helping everyone they come into contact with. I have accompanied them on several bootcamps and was consistently blown away by the compassion, genius and dedication of the instructor staff.

Also, I am especially happy that I was involved in the launch of Tyler's Blueprint, which is an amazing work - a true piece of modern philosophy from a true philosopher.

Nonetheless, I am glad that I have left the community, and I do not regret my decision to leave RSD. However, I still have a deep love and respect for the guys I worked with, and I will miss them all. With the potential exception of Jeffy. He's a dick. Kidding. Love you Jeff.

;p

So that's all I've got to say for now. It was one hell of a ride, guys.

Oh, and stay tuned to the blog. I will continue to update. And you're not going to want to miss this.

Ever Yours

Ciaran

Source: http://zentransformation.blogspot.com/2 ... ement.html

Another one:

I was an extremely introverted person in high school who pined over a girl for years after she moved from my city. Finally after 3.5 years of pining I decided to do something. I got into pickup, which totally changed my dating life. I rose through the ranks, and eventually lived in LA with Mystery, Style, TD, Papa, and others. I taught workshops with Mystery for around a year, and eventually had a falling out with him when I (sort of) stole his girlfriend.
You can read the long version of that story here.
The Game is a book about the pickup community, focusing on our experience in LA. My real name is Tynan, but I go by "Herbal" in the book.
[...]
Yes, I do. I think it's a pretty dangerous thing to do halfway. You get to a point where you are horribly miscalibrated, so instead of playfully joking, you actually insult girls. You can't go back because you know why being an AFC doesn't work.
I'd say the typical progression is bad with women -> offensive to women -> good with women
I also agree that a lot of people teaching probably shouldn't be teaching (including myself when I first began teaching).
Routines are valuable in that they let you take your mind of WHAT you're going to say, and focus on body language and such for the first 5-10 minutes of the interaction. Trying to run routines all night long is dishonest and counterproductive.
Source: http://www.reddit.com/r/IAmA/comments/9 ... ame_a_nyt/

But I’m beginning to think it’s true. It started with being ashamed to tell my mother, to not being able to be honest about it to girls, to seeing the discomfort on my friends’ faces when I tried to explain, to forgetting about my mates as I fired up a club, to feeling empty as hell after a weekend of great parties and having sex. Is this what it’s all about? When do I see my ex-girlfriend and see her look at me with awe and understand why I broke up with her? As it stands, I feel more distanced from that than ever. Not that I’ll kill myself because it’s still fun to do this and there’s still gratification out there, but where does it stop? What am I gaining? Am I becoming richer, or seeping off my self-worth?

Source: http://belgianpua.wordpress.com/2008/11 ... of-pickup/

[Playboy]

Interesting. So Mehdi, you're a fan of Brent's methods, aren't you? Or have you turned around on that one?

[Mehdi]

Interesting. So Mehdi, you're a fan of Brent's methods, aren't you? Or have you turned around on that one?

Brent's stuff is not a method. It's not something you do, it's something you are.

Although I don't agree with everything, I like it. But that's because it fits with my personality.

[RMDS]

How was this thread not locked down a long time ago?

One of Stronglifts forum's greatest attributes was that threads were always kept relevant and never allowed the descend into circular, pointless and petty argument.

Reading some of this just makes one want to bang head against desk.

[Mehdi]

How was this thread not locked down a long time ago?

One of Stronglifts forum's greatest attributes was that threads were always kept relevant and never allowed the descend into circular, pointless and petty argument.

Reading some of this just makes one want to bang head against desk.

First post: "Mistake #5: Using Pick-Up Techniques". Most of this thread is about whether this is true or not.

[luco]

I do agree a little with RMDS, since people's views haven't really changed since the beginning of the discussion. Alot of repetition it seems.

[RMDS]

First post: "Mistake #5: Using Pick-Up Techniques". Most of this thread is about whether this is true or not.

I was merely echoing this sentiment:

This whole thread is a waste of time.