The Crabs
Mar 28th, 2008 by Mehdi Tags: Inspiration, Strength Training
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This is a topic a friend of mine & me often talked about when I was employed. A topic he recommended me to write about on StrongLifts.com, but I hadn’t found a way to put it into words until now. The Crabs.
The Crabs story dates back to the days I spend hours surfing on SoSuave at work. I don’t visit SoSuave much anymore, but it opened my eyes on a lot of things. I wouldn’t be doing this today without it.
The Crabs story.
The thing about AFCs are that they’re a bunch of crabs in a barrel. Just as one starts to lift himself out of the barrel, the other crabs will grab him and pull him back in.
AFCs are Average Frustrated Chumps. Guys who don’t get the girls and whine about it. If this sounds familiar, don’t worry it’s curable. Check out Real Social Dynamics (start with Foundations, then The Blueprint Decoded).
The Red Pill. If you watched the movie The Matrix, you’re familiar with the Red Pill. Once you take the Red Pill, you become aware of the system. The rat race, relationships, money, thoughts, feelings, … all start to make sense.
Call it consciousness, awareness, breaking social conditioning. Breaking thought patterns & habits you had for years takes time. Taking the Red Pill is the start, getting out of the barrel is the journey to “enlightenment”.
There is a difference between knowing the path and walking the path. - The Matrix
The Crabs. Tell your kids for 20 years they’re losers and they’ll become losers. Your environment influences your thoughts. Many of your friends, colleagues & family are crabs. And they’ll repeatedly try to pull you back into the barrel.
Crabs don’t realize what they do. Sometimes it’s jealousy because you have the guts to do what they can’t. Often it’s because they don’t want to be alone in the barrel. Russ showed Tuesday typical Crab behavior: self-limiting belief.
You’re in a very difficult business with many many competitors. You won’t make a living from this site - fact.
Translation: come back into the barrel. Ask crabs why they’re demotivating you or talking you down, and they’ll answer something like “I’m a realist” (which you can only be in the now, not in the future).
More examples of crab thinking you’ll hear daily once you take the Red Pill:
- “You should never Squat below parallel. It’s bad for your knees.”
- “You’ll never get that girl. You’re not ripped/rich/popular enough.”
- “Don’t start a business. Most businesses fail. Keep your day job.”
Dealing with Crabs. 1 reason people fail to achieve their goals is because crabs repeatedly tell them they can’t do it. Never listen to crabs. You are responsible for your future. No-one else.
- Believe. “Your only limitation is the one that you set up in your own mind.” & “You can do it if you believe you can” - Napoleon Hill. Remember these.
- Agree. Leave the crabs in their barrels. No need to get into arguments with them. Agree and focus on your goals.
- Remove. Your environment influences your thoughts. Remove crabs from your life. The more you do this, the better.
- Connect. You can find people who got out of the barrel or are trying to get out of it just like you. Look for them, they’re out there.
- Succeed. Success is the best revenge. Revenge should never be your motivation, but succeeding is the only answer you should give.
Self-Confidence. When I started StrongLifts.com, crabs told me that I was in a difficult business with many competitors. 11 months later this blog counts close to 10k subscribers. AFAIK only Dosh Dosh & zen habits did similar or better.
I’ve already seen the word “luck” popup. This has nothing to do with luck. I’ve NEVER doubted that I’d get 10k subscribers. And I’m confident I’ll make money out of this blog. Time will bring the non-believers proof.
You’ll NEVER achieve something with that kind of retard thinking that you need luck, genetics, money or whatever to get somewhere in life. You underestimate your own capabilities. You can do MORE than you THINK.
I believe I can get whatever I want out of life if I work hard. Sounds arrogant? I don’t care. I don’t care what you think of me. Caring about what people think, say or write is social conditioning and keeps you in the barrel.
I don’t waste time replying to flaws in reasoning, challenges, personal attacks, etc. In the future only forum members will be able to discuss articles. Removing anonymosity brings back civilness. Read what you wrote.
Think well before you speak because your words may plant the seed of either success or failure in the mind of some other person. - Napoleon Hill
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Good article, but maybe you could re-position the orders of believe, agree, remove, connect, succeed to:
Connect
Remove
Agree
Believe
Succeed
It spells out crabs lol, amkes it more memorable
Mehdi hits another home run. My life has been innondated with CRABS. This post is the perfect example of how Stronglifts is crab pest control.
You’re an inspiration Mehdi. To paraphrase Teddy Roosevelt, the credit belongs to the man in the arena. Not those on the sidelines commenting.
I was thinking about this “crabs in a bucket” phenomena in a totally different context earlier today. Over here in the States Barack Obama is being dragged down into a discussion of race in his campaign for the presidency by his own pastor. I’m not ascribing motive here, but it is an interesting parallel all the same.
Great post Mehdi. What you say never fails to motivate my skinny ass to the gym.
Just a quick comment…
This was a wonderful topic, and with every sentence I thought “that is so true” and could associate names and situations with each. It’s a great reminder, and I am going to work some acronym into the message to remember it every day.
I am a 39 yr old certified firefighter/EMT that is testing at any department that will hire a snot-nose rookie that is about to reach 40. I am considerably out of shape since graduating from the academy, but signed on to strong lifts for motivation and tips to get back into shape.
When I chose to make the career change, I had maybe 1-2 people in my friend network that thought I would even finish the academy. One was a former volunteer FF and the other the wife a US Soldier. They stood by me and supported me while scores of others acted as crabs to my face AND behind my back. Yes, the success was the greatest revenge, but I found it really didn’t matter: I removed myself from their social networks. Now, it’s almost a repeat…I have all the certifications, graduated valedictorian of my fire academy class and salutatorian of my EMT class, but I am now testing against the best of the best, sometimes for 1-2 positions out of over 300 applicants.
So here I am. I have never been a “big” or “fit” guy…always either really skinny (when I was young) or giant belly (since I “lost” the metabolism)…some would say I was skinny-obese. Nonetheless, Stronglifts has taken a fire axe to MY barrel, and for that I say thank you. Keep up the good work!
-firehiker
We share the same philosophy on this
A big help for shutting down limiting and negative stuff is recognizing them in your own thoughts. Replace your negative thoughts with positivity and belief in yourself. You can achieve all, you are able to do all. People will tell you you’re being a dreamer, but I DON’T SEE ANY REASON TO NOT THINK THE BEST OF THINGS. THINKING SOMETHING WILL NOT BE OPTIMUM HAS NO USE, THINKING IT WILL TURN OUT AS POSITIVE AS POSSIBLE CAN ONLY HELP YOU. As you have changed your thinking, you will treat others differently as well when they try to limit you. You’ll want them to shut up, most likely.
Great post! Set a goal and believe it, then live that goal every day. Don’t let anyone tell you that you can’t do it, it`s too hard, you’ll fail etc. Stick to your guns and don’t give up your beliefs. Leave the other crabs in their cage.
Parents: encourage your kids and let them know if they really want something, they CAN do it/ get it. Kids are very susceptible to praise, I know mine are.
I think this post shows exactly why I keep reading - you have the knowledge to know that strength training is not *just* strength training. You could say that you get the big picture, and this makes every single post interesting, no matter the subject of it. Keep it up man, and good luck with the forum!
Mehdi, you’re a true guru. Keep up the good work.
So Russ is a crab…that explains all the pinching…
Jack Canfield (a Napoleon Hill wannabe) refers to “crabs” as “The-Ain’t-It-Awful-Club”. I love your thinking, Mehdi. I’ll admit I wasn’t seeing the whole picture in your last post, when you announced the changes. I see it now — and think it’s very smart, and have every confidence that you’ll achieve your vision.
Keep up the inspiring work!
Great post Mehdi! Using that crab analogy really makes it vivid for a lot of us readers. I too have lots of crabs in my life who try to keep me from succeeding and from reaching my goals. Thanks for posting such an insightful post, and I know that you can make money out of this site! You deserve it after all the hard work and effort you put into it.
Mehdi,
You’ve already created something (Stronglifts) out of nothing more than your own vision. Since the whole venture looks pretty well organized from the outside, I’m going to assume you put a lot of thought into how to take Stronglifts to the next level.
Although I’d never recommend people ignore feedback from their customers, you still need to take all the comments with a big grain of salt. I wouldn’t let people who say it won’t work bother me at all. As for the ones who say they wouldn’t pay, that is more interesting, but maybe those aren’t actually your customers.
Good luck man,
Richard
Here in the States, in the Black community, we have another name for AFCs. Haters.
fancy me some crab now.
good post.
First let me say I love your site - Filled with great stuff and I hope you don’t charge just to access the site/blog - only the forum for the more personal responses. I literally found your site 2 weeks ago and was thrilled at all the great info. I’ve started implementing the 5×5’s now and am enjoying my workouts much better than my past routines. And the day my netvibes account wouldn’t show your rss updates because your site was down my first thought was, “Shit what happened? Do I need to send him some $ to help him pay for the site!” - Hence my vote for donations, but I know folks rarely do that. I of course would prefer NOT to pay, but who wouldn’t?
For now, I say do what you need to do. Charge whatever you can get away with or whatever you need to cover costs - whatever your priority. I am certainly not a negative thinker and I agree you are in complete charge of your life and only you bring in the good, the bad, the challenges and the people into your life. So I’ll support your mission whatever you choose to do, maybe not with my money (which remains to be seen depending on what your pricing is like), but with believing in whatever you truly know to do.
You’ve heard all the reasons why people won’t do it (no one else does, I’ll find it elsewhere, you’re not a super star sports trainer, blah blah blah). But lets see why people WILL PAY:
1- You’ll market it different - It won’t be a “Pay Forum” as people think of it now - who would pay for a forum anyway? It will be a “Fitness Community where Your Questions Get Answered in a No BullSh*t Fashion” kind of way. I can’t expect to get quality training information for free. People WILL pay for this - maybe not some of your current readers, but there are plenty out there who will.
2- You (subscriber) will get answers from one person - Not whichever “Muscle Head” is trolling around the forums that hour. And you’ll get support from others as a subscriber - with their answers reviewed daily. Having one person answer questions and give advice and workout plans builds trust in the site as well as the person. As a user, you’ll quickly see if your online trainer (who chooses to operate in forum fashion) is worth what you’re paying.
3- Why devalue the profession of a personal trainer by giving programs and advice away for free constantly?
4- It’s one thing to write some articles to help people and give exercise advice. But to go out of your way everyday all day, AND pay $200/month to do it? HOW DOES THAT MAKE SENSE TO PEOPLE?
Sure it’s just a forum in the end, but just like any business, what’s gonna make you different from your competitors when no one else charges for their forums? Like I said, I just found your site. I don’t know crap about you personally, but the way you give advice so directly and layout your information and knowledge, I believe you know what you’re talking about and practice what you preach. Keep up the informative posts.
This is my first post on your site Mehdi, though I’ve been reading StrongLifts for a couple of months now. I just want to say that you’re doing an amazing job. All of your articles are of such good quality. The best thing is that there’s just no hype - You just tell it how it is. Good on you Mehdi, and keep up the great work, and don’t let those decapod crustaceans get you down!
You’ll get crabs hanging around the SoSuave forums. Gross
How amazingly odd that you post this. About a few weeks ago, I started reading about Pickup Artists, and read the Game by Neil Strauss. And…I realized that I was, like so many countless others, an Average Frustrated Chump. I whined about girls, about how they always went after the, well, simply put, ***hole. So, I decided to change, and I am. Opinions don’t matter, what people say don’t matter. Improve yourself and destroy the notions that people have of what you can’t do. Girls don’t go after ***holes, no, they go after confident men. Don’t follow, don’t falter, and don’t bend.
Around the same time I started reading into everything, I came across this website, and used the advice and help to change my body. Just had to comment on the sheer oddity that you too have been through this. Small world.
Heh, give ‘em hell Mehdi.
anthony
AFC in rehab.
My coworkers like to bring candy to work that they don’t want their kids eating. I was having a down day because I ate about 500 cals of chocolates. I was doing some negative thinking, and telling myself I will never reach my goals because I have no discipline to stop picking at candy when I see it. I now realize I am just defeating myself. Tonight I will refocus myself in the gym and hit some records.
Good Job Teacher.
Mehdi,
Post this daily.
It is the EXACT reason we are overweight and lazy.
There is no such thing as I CAN’T.
Thank you, Thank you, THANK YOU!!!!
Lee
Excellent post
I think that is the best analogy I have seen for this concept, very easy to visualize the reality.
I have been reading for a few weeks now and am impressed with your blog, best of luck.
One reason I keep returning to this blog is just because I like your confidence and way of thinking about things. The quality of the articles to a lesser extend (although they are very good ;)).
I just hope you prove yourself right! In fact I’d be willing to make a donation (heck, with the t-shirt contest you were the first person I ever donated to in my life), but still have my doubts about your current future plans…
Good luck anyhow!
Collie Buddz - Blind to you Haterz. Best hit of last year
Awesome post. Those crabs are so slippery too, trying to pull even one of them out of the barrel is so hard. Setting an example by succeeding is the best way to do that also!
Once again thank you Mehdi for a web site that is anchored in a way of thinking that’s encouraging. I share your philosophy. I’d keep writing a lot about it but I think it is not necessary.
Let’s keep getting better day by day.
Mehdi,
As always, excellent article. I can’t speak for the rest of the world. But in my personal situation growing up as a poor kid, the worst crabs were usually my relatives and “friends.” Those people who were supposed to be on my side were the same ones who went out of their way to drag me down and kick my balls so I can’t get up. Once I succeeded I took a rubber band and wrapped it around their mouths the way a lobster’s claw is wrapped, figuratively speaking of course. It was a polite way of saying “shut the f&*^ up!! I made it..” Success is the best revenge indeed.
I must say I like this direction with the seduction and personal development stuff. Keep up the awesome work, mate!
I liked the article. Thanks Mehdi.
I do have to disagree on one point though. I don’t think that “You should never Squat below parallel. It’s bad for your knees.” is an example of crabs in the bucket. Rather, I think that’s more of a case of mis-information. The reason I point out the difference is that if anyone ever says to you “You should never Squat below parallel. It’s bad for your knees.”, it’s probably more helpful to you and the person talking to you if you respond “I disagree. You should check out StrongLifts.com for information about that.”, rather than ignoring the guy and thinking “This jerk is trying to hold me back.”
Just my opinion.
Sosuave is terrible. It is just another seduction board. If anything, read some of Pook’s stuff. Pook will open your eyes to Nature, and not boggle your mind with “seduction” and other unNATURAL things.
That’s what the site should be used for - opening your eyes to Nature. After that, you can leave. There are members of that board who have been there for years. They try to get an e-reputation, pretending to “help others.”
No. It isn’t a help forum. It is just a forum where everyone states their opinion and shoots down everyone else’s. It’s a forum where people go with their problems and expect others to tell them what to do. Imagine that: letting some random people over the internet control your life.
If you learn to live with Nature, you don’t need Sosuave. Sosuave is the opposite of Nature - you can relate the posters there with the “Philosophers” of the world. The Sosuaver’s use their life for becoming a “Don Juan” instead of becoming a “Don Juan” for life. Likewise, the Philosopher uses life for philosophy, instead of using philosophy for life.
The only way to truly understand the fundamentals of that site is to eventually leave it.
So yea, don’t go to Sosuave. You don’t need to learn how to become a Don Juan. You were given that trait when you were born - the blessing of being a MAN - by Nature. Society only makes you forget. You just need to remember.
Hi Mehdi,
Thanks for writing such an encouraging article. I wonder how many things I don’t do because of ‘crabs’? I’m definitely going to let this sit in my mind for a while.
Keep it up!
Elliot
Whoa. Good article.
1337lolzz> Well put!
…
Reminds me of something I saw painted on a house in Jamaica:
“Beware me of my friends, because I know my enemies.”
I think the title should be “Dealing with Crab Mentality”.
When I saw the RSS Title, I thought you were talking about a different “Crabs”, which is possible in this blog.
Yeah, this just made me really hungry for some crab. Yum!
Very true. Very good article.
wow, i dont read this page and i just stumbled upon it while looking at my psyc homework but that post really made my day. today has been a depressing day of me totally being a “crab” and telling myself that i cant do anything. i gotta say this has made me feel much better. i think that this blog is a weightlifting blog, but irrelevent i will be back just for some weight/self help. thank you for helping get through the day.
wil
All I have to say is “Hell yeah!” I found this blog just last night cuz I was looking for some lifting advice, but man, you got a lot more than that. Make me subscriber 10001! Probably higher, but you get the idea…
Andrew
“I believe I can get whatever I want out of life if I work hard. Sounds arrogant? I don’t care. I don’t care what you think of me. Caring about what people think, say or write is social conditioning and keeps you in the barrel.”
–> Very well said and keep up the good articles !
I think that this is a really good article and that is very true. It has happened to me and it really sucks. You always have to try to avoid crabs because they will lower your self-steem like crazy. Be wise and so what the article says, its very accurate
I 100% agree, Good Post! There needs to be more minds in this world who think like that.